Good Things Come To Those Who CREATE: 3 Tips for Actively Creating Your Happiness

When we place our happiness in outside people and circumstances, it’s easy to feel like it might slip away at any moment. Happiness will always be fleeting so long as it is defined outside of the self.

If you are — like most people — someone who looks outside of yourself for peace and happiness, you may be setting yourself up to experience a life that feels limited and outside of your influence. It is when we give these external factors the power to “make us happy” that we misunderstand the true meaning of happiness.

In truth, we are all the creators of our own happiness. Happiness is not something that requires us to look to the outside world, but within. Cultivating happiness takes a concerted effort; it is not a passive process.

Anything outside of you can fade away. Yet at the core, your higher self is aware that people can be fickle, circumstances are often temporary, jobs and relationships come and go, and therefore, none of these things are solid foundations on which to build your self-worth.

Allow me to present the idea that happiness is best when we see it as something to be created or chosen.

Below, read three suggestions on how you can begin to create your own internal happiness, independent of people, places, or things:

Creating Happiness Exercise #1: Practice Self-Fulfilling Prophecies, or The Law Of Attraction

Too often, we wait until some far away goal is achieved before we celebrate ourselves. We say, “I’ll be happy once I find the one,” “once I lose 20 pounds,” “once I earn more money.” All this does is “otherize” happiness as some distant destination—in sight, but forever just outside of our grasp. Instead, what is more helpful is to envision the life you want for yourself and begin practicing that version of yourself a little bit each day.  In time through your practice, you may see things subtly change in the direction of your thoughts and actions.

The Law of Attraction has gained lots of traction within the self-help community as an easily applicable practice for self-development and personal growth thanks to best-selling books like Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill, You Can Heal Your Life by Louise L. Hay, and The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. In short, the law states that like attracts like, or in other words, we get back what we put out into the Universe. Thus, if we put out self-deprecation and negativity, that is what our circumstances will reflect. Conversely, if we speak life into our capabilities, we are more likely to attract positive results.

When exercising the Law of Attraction, it is important not to pay attention to your current circumstances. Even if you are unhappy with where you are in life, channel your energy into the person you wish to become, and assume that identity today. If you want to be successful, adopt the mentality and the behaviors you know a successful person would exhibit. If you want to be in a loving relationship, open your heart and mind to giving and receiving love more freely. With the Law of Attraction, you create your happiness by actively giving power to your thoughts and actions and sending that power out into the Universe. Choose to be at peace with right now — with where you are — and you will attract more peace.

Creating Happiness Exercise #2: Practice Gratitude

Sometimes, we have the ingredients for happiness all around us, but for some reason we have a hard time seeing them. It’s like a puzzle—when you look at one individual piece, it’s not much to write home about. It’s not until you step back and look at the entire picture that you recognize the magnificence that life has to offer right in front of you. If you feel unsatisfied with your life, perhaps you just need to zoom out, and widen your focus a bit.

Everything may not be exactly as you desire at the moment, but you can create happiness for yourself just by focusing on what is amazing about your life. Good health, good friends, shelter, food—none of these things in and of themselves may make you happy, but being grateful for them will certainly elevate your mood and open your spirit to the idea of embracing yourself and your life—and that cultivates peace and happiness.

Creating Happiness Exercise #3: Practice Mindfulness

We often rob ourselves of happiness by dwelling in the past or being anxious about the future. We’re either lamenting something that went wrong once upon a time, or worrying about something that has yet to come. It’s difficult to be happy when you’re focusing on these things, because both the past and the future are beyond your control and only exist in your mind.

By practicing mindfulness, we zero in on the now. Life exists in the present moment; in acknowledging the power of the present, we recognize that every moment holds endless creative potential to be whatever we determine it to be. Living in the present means that we have the power to choose our thoughts, which will shape our actions and how the day will unfold. You can read this blog post for a deeper look into mindfulness practice, but simply being out in nature or turning off your phone for a period of time each day will allow you to create your own happiness by awakening you to the present moment.

To be at peace and happy means to be content in who you are, in the present moment, reminding yourself of your nature as a limitless being, regardless of your circumstances. Through this logic, happiness is not something we find, or a destination we reach, but rather a decision we make, day after day, moment to moment, to stand firmly in the power of our existence.

ARE YOU SEEKING WAYS TO BECOME AN ACTIVE CREATOR OF YOUR HAPPINESS? WOULD YOU LIKE TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RECONNECTING TO YOUR PERSONAL POWER? Call Dr. Logan for a free phone consultation at 646.798.8354.

Dr. Logan Jones is a psychologist in Manhattan. He provides therapy for depression, anxiety and trauma to help people disconnect pain from their identities and reconnect to a positive sense of self-worth. If you are seeking tools to increase confidence and create more happiness, book an appointment today.

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